HERE IN MY HOME - MALAYSIAN ARTISTES FOR UNITY

Finally, a song that makes me proud to be a Malaysian. Done by artist and figures in the public eye to promote racial harmony and a single nation. This song should be sung in parliment, in schools or just anywhere in this country rather then Negaraku. Its time to realise that this country is for all races, time to stop looking at each other according to race but as Malaysians. A new race should be born and should be called 'Bangsa Malaysia'.

Politicians especially should take note of this and stop playing the racial card. We are all one nation and deserve equal rights in school, buisnesses and in the government. We should have capable and qualified people holding major positions rather then apointment according to race. The tide is shifting towards this goal after what happend early this year. Its time for the government and the rakyat to look towards embracing nationalism, towards a united people called Malaysians.

Quote Mr. Lee Kwan Yew before the formation of Malaysia, "Malaysia for Malaysians".

MARIE DIGBY MARIE DIGBY MARIE DIGBY!!! She's just awesome!!! Was over at 1 Utama with James yesterday to catch her live showcase. Skipped a movie just to watch her sound-check and to take a picture with her. Yes I got a picture with Marie!!! Man she's sooo cute!!!hehehe. Ok...I admit...I'm crazy over her...haha..

Anyway to top up a great day I did go home with mixed feelings. Saw her at the event that added to the feelings. I has been atleast 8 months since I saw her in person and not in pictures. Yes I still do miss her and love her. She's just such a big part in my life. I know I have to move on and try to forget the pass but why do I want to forget someone who has given me the best years of my life to date? To meet her there was great but also filled with much sadness and regret. The 'if only...' and 'what if...' questions have been playing in my head for the pass few weeks. I tried to distract myself from all of this but it just catches up with me. I just can't show the same love and care to another person other then her. Guess for now this heart is only for her.

Ironically, I have been thinking of her for the pass few weeks and also have been dreaming of her. This is why I was a little moody at times and walk around like there is a do not disturb sign placed on my forehead. Dreams of her was sweet but it turns to nightmares when I'm about to wake up probably due to the fact that we are not together when I wake up. Flashes of the pass keeps coming back recently, I wonder if its reminding me of something nice or just haunting me and filling me with regret. So what will the days ahead bring, I don't know. Many people have been telling me the same things. "If we are in His plans, then we will be together one day". Somehow, somewhere I still feel there is a gilimmer of hope, but how far can feelings go?

This is the third time this week
That I find myself wandering down your street - and i can't seem to give it up.
I've even stopped making these excuses for why you're stuck here in my thoughts when it's been long enough.
I try to keep myself moving, but i'm not going anywhere..

I wait in the same spot
brain like a parking lot
you're the traffic in my head
you're the reason why i'm wrecked
I pray for it to stop
like rain on the sidewalk
traffic in my head
you're the traffic in my head
there's just too much to forget

guess i should be happy now
everything is back to how it was
before you came around
i'm already changing
i've even tried to find a new distraction
but still you surround
as if it's not hard enough

a part of me thinks that i'm going crazy
the world's spinning
my vision is hazy
and none of this makes any sense
i never meant for this to end
i can do what i have to do..
if i could only get around you

I'm walkin down this road alone and figured all I'm thinking bout is you, is you my love
And my head is in a cloud of rain and the world it seems so far away and I'm just waiting for
The droplets, droplets

You left a mark
I wear it proudly on my chest
Above my heart
To Remind me that I feel the best
When I'm with you
To me everything is effortless
You know its true
My eyes are painted with regret and I don’t need it

Cuz I'm walkin down this road alone and figured all I'm thinking bout is you, is you my love
And my head is in a cloud of rain and the world it seems so far away and I'm just waiting to fall and sink into your tears

Damn...I just need to release. I foresee a long 2 months ahead after my first week of classes. Although its just 7 weeks, I will seem like forever!!! We're doing LAN subjects this semester, Malaysian Studies, Moral Studies, English and Computing Studies. To make this interesting its all tought in BM. Yeap you saw it, BAHASA MELAYU, FREAKING BAHASA MELAYU!!! I did A-levels to aviod this stupid language and now its back!??!! OMG!!! Can't even understand what the lecturer is crapping at all. To top it up, having freaking lame lectureres will even make the class more exciting. Just imagine the lecturer teaching English can't even speak English properly and freaking lame malay lecturers coming up with lame jokes which normally involves so called malay words which seem more like modified english. Darn...

I mean what's the point in teaching the subject in BM when the main points and terms are modified english?? So why do we need to learn BM? Waste 2 months studying a stupid language that is only used in this freaking small country?? What's the point of learning a language that is so much derived from the english language? Eg. computer-komputer, location-lokasi, technology-teknologi, and we can just go on and on. What's the point of learning classic malay or royal malay language when we don't use it now?? Damn the Malaysian education system!!! Can't really blame the system actually as the head is a malay...sooo...WTF!!! Trying to pomote the use of english language but you youself can't even speak proper english and resorting to know more about the malay language. I rather improve my mandrin which is more widely used then study BM which only this freaking country uses. Even french or spanish is so much more interesting. Atleast it sounds more original.

Once again I do wonder what am I doing in this shit-hole. Its just not the place for me. I might offend some people here but too bad. Sometimes you guys just have to face up to the facts that BM aint that great and you guys aint that great because you're the majority and can change the term Bahasa Melayu to Bahasa Malaysia to sound less racist. Its still a sucky language!!!